Middle-Earth Fanfiction Awards

T'was the Night Before Helm's Deep

Author: Erin's Daughter

Nominator: unknown

2004 Award Category: Genres: Humor: Alternate Universe - First Place

Story Type: Other Fiction : Length: unknown
Rating: PG-13 -- Reason for Rating: some violence, death scene, language
Summary: The usual pre-shift meeting at the Barad-dur Interrogations division includes a reflection on past successes (and the odd failure!), an irrational dislike of a certain Ranger and a visit from an important black-robed personage.... AU.


Review scores are not available for 2004.

Reviewed by: Larian Elensar -- Score: N/A

Hee! Yeah, I giggled most of the way throught it. Especially like the references to Maedhros and G.Galad, author!

Reviewed by: Dwimordene -- Score: N/A

I had a lot of fun reading this one. It's a bit like Dilbert does Middle-earth, in that Barad-dūr is now a bloated bureaucracy, with all the cast of characters that implies... if said characters were orcs, torturers, and Nazgūl. Good for a laugh.

Reviewed by: Thundera Tiger -- Score: N/A

The idea of morale among the Orcs was not one that would have occurred to me, but it makes sense here. Distorted and warped sense, but sense nonetheless. The line that really got to me was the idea that the word "minion" was detrimental and had been dropped. And the idea that the Witch-king has been taking eloquence lessons is a great one, too. Very irreverent and very hilarious look at the Orcs in the Interrogation Division.

Reviewed by: Christine -- Score: N/A

Hilariously written! The content was seriously inventive and the ingenuity of the author has brought a few giggles and laughs out of me today. Seriously well done and worth reading more than once.

Reviewed by: Viv -- Score: N/A

What inspired use of parenthetical asides! And I loved the need to acronmymize just everything (e.g., DFNIHAPT). And "Silmarilgate"... hee! Translation of bloodthirsty orc culture into modern business parlance works frighteningly well. I'm currently imagining orcs "thinking outside the box". It ain't a pretty thought. And no, I probably won't be attempting to call my boss "Grumpy-Britches" on Monday. But I'll be thinking it.

Reviewed by: Fourth Moon -- Score: N/A

The "depicting the forces of evil as a large corporation" didn't catch on with me that well, probably because I've seen it done before. There are some good laughs though, like the " Department For New, Interesting, and Hopefully Agonizingly Painful Tortures". The charm of this story is for me in the respectless, "good grief what a nuisance that was" tone in which the overview on characters and events - that is really delightful and has me chuckling happily.

Reviewed by: Marta -- Score: N/A

*Snork* "Several weeks later, at the front..." This was the funniest thing I'd read in a long time. I particularly liked the bit about Gollum as a water-rat. He *does* look a bit like that, at least in movieverse.

Reviewed by: Ainaechoiriel -- Score: N/A

I liked best the part where it said the spear lodged in his throat was a bit of a distraction. ;-) I'd say so! Cleverly done story there.