Yahoo Forum Archive

Sorry that I've had even less time than I expected to read in the last day,
so I could only read a few drabbles and resurrect some comments from a
couple stories that I've reviewed in the past. (Hope that copying comments
from prior reviews, like at Stories of Arda, is acceptable -- I've mentioned
it within each relevant review in case it is not.)

- Barbara


Drama
Official Voting Ballot

Drabble
DD2: Dernhelm's Ride by Lindelea

Very nice, Lindelea! I liked the repetitive nature of your mentions of
death -- particularly effective in a drabble. Also, I liked the repeated
inclusions of canon quotes -- to death and the world's ending -- and -- the
dogs roll on the floor with the brats. The last line was very powerful, as
well.


Drabble
DD3: Dragons by Lindorien

(This drabble was, unfortunately, not available to comment on, and I
couldn't find it even using a Google search. I would have loved to read
it.)


Drabble
DD4: Fealty and Service by Marta

I like this, Marta! It's sometimes said by us old(er) people that our
parents never see us as true adults until we marry and have children. In
the case of a necessarily-martial society (stuck on the edge of Mordor),
this swearing-in ceremony must be Faramir's threshold of full manhood in
Denethor's eyes. I was especially struck by Denethor's musings on naming
Faramir "Sufficient Jewel"; I think he regrets selling his son short now.
"Kindred flesh, men of Gondor." A perfect summary of what they share, in so
few words. Bravo!

Drabble
DD5: Fear! Fire! Foes! by Marta

Nice view of Fatty's contribution to the safety of the Shire. In
retrospect, it does make sense that the family might have been paralyzed by
fear if they truly understood the threat of the Nazgýlý maybe it was good
that he was out of breath! I also like your understated mention of the
Black Breath.

Drabble
DD6: Lament To Lorien by Naresha

I love the idea of a cluster of related drabbles, all giving a very personal
view of Haldir. Very nice idea, and nicely written!

Drabble
DD8: The Call by Alexcat

Very good, Alexcat! I was able to guess the object quicklyý very sinister
and broodingý

Drabble
DD9: The Silent Street by Lindelea

Oh, dear, this pulls me into the action immediately and makes me feel that I
am right there. I hadn't read your summary, but I like the fact that you
established the character, the event and the locale immediately -- hard to
do in so few words! Good references to canon -- Denethor's words add to the
urgency of the situation. The fact that one of the men he slew was his
nephew really brings the pain home -- these are not just his peers, they are
kindred as well. Good use of repetition with "heart". I really get the
sense of outrage -- Beregond has never been disloyal, but he is called that
and worse because he is trying to save the life of his beloved Captain!
That's insanity!

Drabble
DD10: The Steward and the King by Marta

Lovely vignette, Aure-enteluva! I like the contrast of Thorongil's
nonchalance with Boromir's earnest concentration on the very serious matter.
A sad commentary that children should have to lose their innocence so
early -- he's a toddler, for heaven's sake! I liked that you ended on such
a hopeful note.

Gap-filler
DG1: A Silence Covered in Stone by Zimraphel

(Some of the following is from my review on Stories of Arda:) Wow,
Zimraphel, as usual this story is incredibly powerful. I barely made it
through the prologue because of my own claustrophobia - your words there
were just a little *too* evocative! The sensation of being absolutely
trapped was overwhelming. **Shudder!** Your Thranduil is such a powerful
presence, very ably drawn. Such incredible pain to see his people and realm
nearly destroyed, yet he still clung to his overwhelming distrust of other
elves! Thranduil could think of fewer deaths that were worse. That
statement made me turn cold, and now that I've read chapter 2, I understand
that it was the foreshadowing that gave me goose bumps. In chapter 2, I
really liked the fact that Thranduil seemed to warm to Celeborn a bit after
realizing that he was not going to abandon Arda soon. Perhaps he does learn
to trust a bit? Your Celeborn is such a wise and steady influence on his
people in Middle-earth. He is incredibly strong to have such a close and
trusting relationship with Galadriel and not be in the least subsumed by it.
He has also lived so long as to have seen nearly everything -- but still
has the heart to be saddened and outraged when some new variation of
Sauron's evil is uncovered. After reading this story (when you first
published it), I went and re-read about the fate of Eýrnur; I have to say,
absolutely nothing in Tolkien's tale came close to preparing me for the
level of evil your story describes! *Goosebumps and shivers!*

Post-WOTR
DPoW18: The Last Grey Ship by ErinRua

I've told you this before (in my review on Stories of Arda, part of which is
copied here), but this is one of my top favorite handful of stories -- and
I've probably read at least a thousand LoTR fanfics. The friendship between
Legolas and Gimli stirs my soul, after probably the dozenth time I've read
this story. Your words are magic. I go back to read your story again and
again when I want to be inspired by the richness of your language, that
paints such evocative word-pictures. And the interaction between Legolas
and Gimli (and Aragorn) is incredible -- these friends know each other so
well. (Like, you can't get an Elf to stir when he doesn't want to, and
can't get him to stop once he has decided to go -- badly paraphrased, I
know, but it seems like such a spot-on assessment of Legolas. Actually, it
reminds me of someone I know: me! LOL!) And Gimli's enormous sorrow when
he thinks his friend will leave, and he will miss him but doesn't want to
get in his way. (I always cry at the part where Legolas looses his last
arrow on Middle-earth; it just seems so final; of course, that's only after
I have finally dried my eyes from the first parts of the story... and then
start blubbering again at the end...) You can tug on my heart-strings any
day, ErinRua!

Pre-WOTR
DPrW1: A Family Trait by Marnie

Ah, I liked this very much, Marnie! The twins are so earnest and eager to
learn, and the atmosphere is so warm (literally and figuratively). Such a
short story, but it's interesting how you separated the twins' characters so
well, and showed some of their natural sibling rivalry. Celeborn was his
usual sensible self, and it was a pleasure to see that he had earlier tried
and failed to learn smithing, and it didn't seem to embarrass him in the
least. It was a pleasant surprise to find out who their tutor was, and a
pleasure to see the affection between the twins and their mother (as well as
their thoughtfulness about Elrond). The hidden interplay between Celebrýan
and Celeborn when they thought that the twins might want to follow the paths
of the Fýanorians was well-written, as was their relief when the twins
decided they wanted to create swords -- although that, in itself, is
something of a double-edged sword, so to speak. All in all, a lovely
vignette!

_________________________________________________________________
FREE pop-up blocking with the new MSN Toolbar ý get it now!
http://toolbar.msn.click-url.com/go/onm00200415ave/direct/01/